Lately I feel like my engine keeps trying to start, and it just gets going, and then gives up-shuts down.
I don't mean for this blog to be a place where I vent...but, it sort of seems like it. Finding "Joy in the Journey" of being single has been really really rough for me since I hit 30. I'm moving on to 34 this year, and it just seems like nothing for me is going uphill. I feel like I start things, and can never finish them. I feel like my motivation for goals and such is so much less than it was.
Where did that all start? When did that all change for me? When I hit 30? When I went back to BYU 4 years ago? Did my thesis kill me? Are some brain cells dead from all of that? Have the trials been so immense since then that I have forgotten how to enjoy life and love it?
Where is "he" at? Is he still looking for me, or has he given up on it?
Has Heavenly Father given up on me for good?
What am I supposed to be doing with my life?
How can I enjoy this journey I am on?
I just wish for once...that my engine would start...and stay "started"....
:*(
