Thankful-Mission

Today is the last day of 2010.
Sheesh!

How poignant that I end my (rather short) list of thankfuls that I have tried to blog about this season. I meant to write more entries, but just didn't get to them. Grateful for the important ones that I DID blog about! :)

I keep thinking about the important step I took in my life to serve a mission at age 21.
Can't stop feeling thankful for each and every experience.
I think, next to writing a thesis, my mission was the hardest, yet best experience of my life.

I was talking with a friend the other day about memorizing chinese. I briefly felt the pangs associated with that...how challenging and hard that was. I remember wanting so desperately to share the gospel with those sweet people near the beginning of my mission, yet I felt totally useless to do so.

Could not form the words.
Could not teach, inspire, uplift.

And I remember my sweet companion's testimony when she was asked a question she wasn't sure how to answer in chinese. She said, somewhat quoting 1 Nephi 11:17..."I know that He loveth His children, nevertheless I do not know the meaning of all things". I remember as I listened to her, I felt a wave of peace about the simple truths I knew to be true. And how learning the gospel in chinese really helped me to appreciate the simple testimony that I had.

Every once in a while I ponder on this experience, and feel ever grateful that my mission taught me the "simple truths". Like how words mean so much...my most favorite...repentance. "Huigai" (悔改). In this chinese character for repentance, the meaning is so much deeper. It means, "Every day, with your heart, change".

And so I sit here and am filled to the brim with thankfulness for my missionary experience in Taiwan. I'm sure I would have loved serving anywhere in the world, and I would have had amazing experiences. For some reason, Heavenly Father felt I needed to "get back to the basics" and learn this amazing gospel in chinese. 

I was truly humbled and totally dependent upon the Lord so that I could, "form the words, teach, inspire, and uplift".

Thankful-Homes

I've been reading through some of my journals lately and counting up places that I've lived.

16 to be exact.

Home.
Dorms.
Hillcrest.
Oakey.
Clifford Estates.
Fengyuan.
Pingtung.
Fengshan.
Chaochou.
Cinnamon Tree.
Locust Lane.
Vine house.
Chambery.
The Ranches.
Locust Lane (again).
Pemberley.
Country Springs.

And I've had a total of about 45 roommates, I think.

Wow.

I'm so thankful.
Thankful for the experiences that I have had being independent.
I can live on my own.
Support myself.
Make a life for myself.

And these homes and roommates have definitely prepared me, I think, for having a home and family of my own someday.

So thankful that I've done so much.
I've truly learned A LOT!

Thankful-Travels

I love that I have been able to travel the world.

Including a lot of states in the U.S., here are the countries

that I have been privileged to visit:

Canada

China

Macau

Taiwan

England

France

Wales

Scotland

Ireland

Spain

Throughout these travels, I have met amazing people in amazing cultures!

I've been able to see the world's beauty and learn to appreciate it!

I'm so grateful for this chance to be single and enjoy life :)

Thankful-Education

Two years ago during the month of November, in response to a sister's invite to be more thankful, I wrote Thankful posts every day on my main blog. I want to do that again, but this time, veer my thankful posts towards the fact that I am still single at 34. And post until the end of this year-through December. I want to recognize all of the many things that I have been able to do up until this point.

I want to feel grateful, not saddened, to be single at 34.

Because I really want to live by my motto this year "34 and enjoying it all the more".

I find that when I am more thankful, I am happier. Life feels better.

The first and foremost thing that I am thankful for being single at 34 is MY EDUCATION.

Associates degree
Ricks College 1996

Health Science

Bachelors Degree

BYU 2002

Elementary Education

Masters Degree

BYU 2009

Teacher Education

Couldn't be more grateful!

Hopeful

I've felt different for a couple of weeks now.

More hopeful.

Excited about my future.

Believing about what's ahead for me.

I'm grateful that Heavenly Father gives me little experiences along the way to cheer me on and strengthen my faith in Him that things will work out. Life has surprises coming my way. God is aware of me.

And he is out there somewhere.

I totally believe in that.

Some of that

I wanna love somebody. And be loved.

Today at church I watched this little family...kids playing with each other, hugs and kisses given, and winks from the mom and dad to each other every few minutes. I couldn't get enough of it. And I hoped for that of my own someday.

Even if it means trials come with it...and I know they do...

I sure want me some of that.

Ruts.

I want to feel good about being single and like I said yesterday, "34 and enjoying it all the more"...

I'm sure I will have up and down days, and I don't want to only record the up days.

Someday when I get married and have a little family, I am going to look back on these entries and be so grateful that I recorded my thoughts...the good AND the bad.

Today, was a bad day.

I'm having  a rough time focusing on my job at the moment. Each time school starts, I find myself just wishing that I was the mom and that I was doing school shopping for them and taking them to meet their teachers, getting them ready the first day of school, helping with homework, going to their SEP conferences, etc., etc.

I want that in my life.

I'm sure when it does come around, I will be wishing that I didn't have all that responsibility and have to be in charge of so much for them...but, I do want that. It's a righteous desire that I have.

I woke up today and just fought every second going to work. I feel unhappy where I am at, yet I am trying to have a positive attitude about it. I'm trying to make the most out of my situation and being where I'm at. I need to find ways to get out of my "ruts" when I am in them...because I frequently get in them. I spoke with Lori today about my feelings and came to the conclusion that I have a positive outlook on my life and where I'm at right now for like 5 hours, and then I start feeling down again.

What things can I be doing to get myself out of the rut feelings, and feeling positive about it all again?